Chasing “It”
I used to do it…
I loved it…
It was the reason I got out of bed each day!
I smoked it…
I popped it…
I snorted it…
I drank it…
Once I started it…
I couldn’t stop it…
I consumed it — but the more I consumed it, the more it was consuming me.
She had it… and I desired it.
But it… was something I was still searching for.
It was elusive. And no matter how many times I thought I had it,
It was never really there.
I bought it…
I sold it…
I stole for it…
It robbed me…
It made me rich…
It made me poor…
I worshipped it…
It was my master…
I was willing to die over it…
I watched it…
I hated it…
It made me sick…
It made me happy…
It had me.
But I still kept searching for it.
It was in my dreams…
It was my biggest fantasy…
I was arrested for it…
I almost died for it…
Yet I kept chasing it.
No matter what I did,
No matter how hard I tried,
I could never truly obtain it.
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Then one day — HE showed up.
And HE had IT.
After all this time, out of nowhere…
HE had the true IT.
There was no denying IT.
IT was real.
IT had substance.
IT lacked nothing.
HE offered IT to me.
I accepted IT.
And this time,
I knew IT was real.
Nothing could take IT away from me.
IT was mine.
And IT — was like nothing I had ever dreamed of or fantasized over before.
IT is…
Love.
Joy.
Peace.
Patience.
Kindness.
Goodness.
Faithfulness.
Gentleness.
Self-control.
IT is everything I never knew I needed.
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John 10:10
Jesus said:
“The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have IT more abundantly.”
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Thanks for reading.
And remember this:
The enemy — the devil — will bring confusion to anything he can.
He’ll blur black and white until everything seems gray.
You won’t know what’s right anymore, and the path forward becomes unclear.
But KNOW THIS:
THE BLOOD OF CHRIST brings clarity to all that you do.
Through THE BLOOD OF JESUS,
There are no gray areas.
Confusion ends.
Black (darkness, evil) and white (light, truth) are no longer blurred.
They are exactly what they’ve always been — black and white.
⸻
Authors Note
In 2006, I met Jesus Christ one-on-one—and my life has never been the same. At the time, I was battling a severe drug addiction and had hit rock bottom. But it was in that place of brokenness that I encountered The One who changed everything. By 2007, I began writing books and blogs about my journey with Christ. “IT” (this blog) was one of the first—a raw, honest reflection of my life from start to finish. In the beginning, I was searching for answers in all the wrong places. Drugs, alcohol, and the fleeting promises of this world offered temporary escape but no real peace. Then Jesus showed up. He gave me something nothing else could—true fulfillment. Finally, life had meaning and purpose, and it wasn’t what the world was trying to sell me in all its materialistic glory. “IT” (the blog) was my attempt to process it all—from the chaos to the clarity. Jesus was the Finisher. When He hung on the cross and declared, “It is finished,” He wasn’t just completing His mission—He was completing mine. Through Him, I now have an expected end: eternal life with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
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